Lunch Break: A Farce in One Act

SCENE: INT.–OFFICE–DAY. I am discovered sitting at my computer, eating a granola bar, with an unopened box of cookies on my desk.

(Enter INTERN)

INTERN

Can I have a cookie?

ME

Sure.

(He opens the box and takes a cookie. Enter CO-WORKER)

CO-WORKER (to ME)

Can I look through your files?

ME

Yeah.

(CO-WORKER turns back to door, looks through file cabinet. Exit INTERN.)

CO-WORKER

All these files are a mess! It’s never been cleaned up since the guy who used to have your job. It was in great shape before he came.

(Enter INTERN, unseen by CO-WORKER)

CO-WORKER (Cont’d)

That idiot who was in here was so stupid.

INTERN

Hey, I’m right here!

ME

No, not you–he means the guy who used to have my job.

INTERN

Oh. (pause) Can I have another cookie?

ME

Sure.

CO-WORKER

These files are such a mess!

INTERN

Why do you have these cookies? You don’t eat food.

ME

I’m eating granola right now.

INTERN

I mean not this kind of food.

CO-WORKER (who has been grumbling about files the entire time)

You should have seen what it used to be like!

INTERN (To ME)

Oh, yeah, you did say you used to be fat.

ME

No, no–he means what the file system used to be like!

INTERN

Oh.

(Exit CO-WORKER, still grumbling, having apparently not found the file. Pause.)

INTERN

Can I have another cookie?

(Curtain.)

12 Comments

    1. Partially. I think of it as being about the way workers in office bureaucracies lose the ability to think about anything outside their own narrow focus, making it impossible for them to communicate with each other effectively, leading to conversations that are incoherent and absurd, as above.

      Sorry… got on a bit of a rant there. But you go a little crazy when you work in an office like that. 🙂

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