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Best Food: Pizza. Once again, these cheese and tomato sauce miracles captured the title.

Best Halloween: 2017. Because it was the first time I did this:

pumpkin 2017

Best Buffalo Bills victory: the Bengals beating the Ravens.

Best Football Team That Doesn’t Seem To Constantly Cheat: the Seattle Seahawks

Best Maxwell’s Maximum:

Best Political Story: “House Stenographer Seizes Microphone In Bizarre Rant”–this would make a great opening scene for a thriller novel. It was so surreal.

Best Batman: Will Arnett

Best New Toy: Space Explorer Remote Control Helicopter.

Best Computer: My MacBook Air. It survived a major scare with water, so extra points for toughness.

Best Movie: Jane Got a Gun. My in-depth take on it here.

Best Book: There were many–see list here.

Best Video Game: Fallout: New Vegas. This was a tough call. The Outer Worlds, Spec Ops: The Line and Mass Effect: Andromeda all made strong cases, but in the end I had to go with the epic post-apocalyptic wasteland that I put nearly 200 hours into. Don’t forget to get the DLC.

Best Awards Show Besides This One: 2017 Academy Awards

Best Tree: The Big One Near the Middle.Tree.jpg

Best Sky:

september sky

 

Best Gilbert and Sullivan Production: The Stanford Savoyards’ 2012 Ruddigore.

Best Wildlife Moment: 

Best TV series: Angie Tribeca. Tragically, ended after four seasons. But we’ll always have detective Hoffman.

 

Best New Album: Stripped Down, by Jo’Rinda Johnsen

Best Video Game Analysis Series: Ross’s Game Dungeon

Best Presidential Candidate for Gilbert and Sullivan Lovers: Russ Sype

Best Presidential Candidate for Literary Fiction Lovers: Mark Paxson (Technically, Mark’s campaign is for 2020, but he declared in 2019, so I’m counting it. If that’s wrong… then Mark will just have to pardon me when he wins.)

Best 52 Short Stories in 52 weeks Challenge Winner: Phillip McCollum

Best Eastern Canadian Blogger: Lydia Schoch

Best Western Canadian Blogger: Audrey Driscoll

Best Western Canadian Napoleonic Historian: Shannon Selin

Best Byzantine Historian: Eileen Stephenson 

Best At Overcoming Technical Difficulties: R.J. Llewellyn 

Best Review of Anything Star Wars-related: Joy V. Spicer’s review of Kenobi

Best Author of a Book About the Dark Side of Academia: Geoffrey Cooper for Nondisclosure

Best Epic Science Fiction Author: Lorinda J. Taylor for The Man Who Found Birds Among the Stars

Best Book Vlogger: Book Club Mom

Best Army Black Knights Fan: Barb Harvey-Knowles 

Best ESXIII: ESXIII

Best Author of a Novel about a Virtual World, United States: Ben Trube

Best Author of a Novel about a Virtual World, Australia: A.C. Flory

Best Mass Effect fan: Isabella Norse

Best KotOR II fan: S

Best W.S. Gilbert historian: Andrew Crowther

Best W.S. Gilbert quoter: Charlee

Best Short Story That You Can Read For Free Right Now: Snowlight by Noah Goats

Best Visual Artist: Katie Dawn. She does lots of great work, but this is one of my favorites:

Best Wisconsin Blogger and Raging Agnostic Snowflake Vegetarian Who Never Learned To Whistle: Thingy

Best Golfer, Historian, Author, Literary Critic, Book Blogger Friend: Pat Prescott

Best Social Commentator, Writing Blogger, Thriller Author, and Ally An Indie Writer Could Ever Have: Carrie Rubin

Best Blog Reader: You!

Berthold Thanks You 2

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I’ll name a famous book, and then recommend a lesser-known book you should read if you enjoyed it. Ready? Let us begin.

a-confederacy-of-dunces@2xIf you like A Confederacy of Dunces by John Kennedy Toole…

…then you should read Incomplete Works, by Noah Goats.iw

The influence of Toole’s legendary comic novel on this book is clear. While the plot isn’t as intricate and the cast not as large, the intelligent, snobbish protagonist of Goats’ novel is definitely a unique character, much like Ignatius J. Reilly.

 

 

HWRIf you like H.P. Lovecraft’s Herbert West–Reanimator series….

…then you should read The Friendship of Mortals by Audrey Driscoll.
51GOZPH3rhL._SY346_

All right, so this is kind of a layup since the latter is based on the former, but if you are familiar with Lovecraft’s interesting but thinly-sketched serial, you have to read Driscoll’s reimagining, in which she fleshes out Herbert West and his world.

 

 

 

AnnihilationBookIf you like Annihilation by Jeff VanderMeer…

…then you should read Ocean Echoes, by Sheila Hurst.

Ocean EchoesNow, you might think this is an odd comparison, especially if you only know Annihilation from the movie adaptation, which is much more sci-fi horror. The movie is very good, but also extremely different than the book. Ocean Echoes isn’t as dark as Annihilation, but both are about a biologist who ventures into the unknown while battling mental demons and scars of past relationships. And both are haunting and beautifully-written.

 

 

TheJungleSinclairIf you like The Jungle, by Upton Sinclair…

…then you should read Eating Bull, by Carrie Rubin.

Okay, confession time here: I don’t like The Jungle. I like Sinclair’s concept of a novel with a social commentary on the meat industry, but the book itself is boring, repetitive and preachy. It’s a neat idea, but it doesn’t work.

eatingbull-book-cover-by-lance-buckleyEating Bull, on the other hand, totally does work because it’s a gripping page-turner of a killer thriller, and the social commentary is woven into the plot, so it feels natural and organic. So, I guess what I’m saying is, if you read only one novel driven by a social comment on Big Food, make it Eating Bull. Also, it’s a bit more timely, being published more than a century after The Jungle.

 

 

***

Now it’s your turn! Name me some famous books, and then some similar, lesser-known book that you think deserves more attention. And yes, it’s completely fair game if you want to list your own books. Go for it.

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Pumpkins2019_1.jpgTrue story: earlier this morning (12:00AM, to be exact) I was standing in a dark field, surrounded by a bunch of glowing jack-o’-lanterns, with a thick fog rolling in and the only sounds were that of a distant train horn and a few birds and insects chirping in the distance. If that isn’t what Halloween is all about, I don’t know what is.

For those who can’t get enough of pictures like the one on the right, I’ll be tweeting various Halloween-ish stuff throughout the day. Whether you love this holiday as much as I do or not, I hope you have a great Halloween. Thanks, as always, for your support.

Now then… there is the matter of the traditional Halloween poem.

I spent a lot of the time I ordinarily spend on the annual poem working on Vespasian Moon, so I kind of ran out of time this year.

Or so I thought. But then, I had an idea.

I’m working on a story that includes a character who writes songs, and one of the songs I’d drafted for him seemed to fit the mood, so I decided to use it. I just couldn’t bring myself to let the streak of posting a Halloween poem end. If, someday, you see this same poem published as part of a larger story… well, all I can say is, Poe did the same thing. I know, I know; the tired old “Edgar Allan did it!” defense.

Herewith, then, is the 2019 Ruined Chapel by Moonlight Halloween poem

***

(more…)

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boat classic clouds cruise
Photo by Inge Wallumrød on Pexels.com

I love ship names. I don’t know why, but I get a real kick out of it when writers name their fictional ships. My favorite example is in Robert W. Chambers’s The Repairer of Reputations, when the characters all go out for a walk and see the ships in the harbor of fictional future New York, and Louis rattles off the names of the vessels. I loved that.

I think the reason I’m so fascinated is that every ship name has a story behind it. You see a ship name, and you automatically wonder why it was given that particular name. It’s an implied story all in itself.

This goes for spaceships in science fiction too, by the way. In fact, I might even enjoy those more, because there’s more room for unusual names. I’m working on a story now that has a spaceship in it, and I’ve been struggling to come up with just the right name. It’s an important consideration–the story that the name suggests to the reader will color their perception of the characters who fly it.

Some fictional ship names I like:

  • Alert–from H.P. Lovecraft’s Call of Cthulhu 
  • Nostromo–Ripley’s ship in Alien
  • Invisible Hand–General Grievous’s flagship in Star Wars: Episode III
  • Tempest–Pathfinder Ryder’s ship in Mass Effect Andromeda
  • PRCS Wall Cloud–a ship carrying a virus in Deus Ex
  • Pillar of Autumn–one of the first ships in Halo

Wikipedia has a list of more fictional ships. Frankly, from skimming it, I think writers aren’t being bold enough with names. The U.S. Navy names ships after famous battles–we need more of that in fiction. Also, more named after obscure historical figures, please.

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I tweeted this video yesterday. It’s been a holiday favorite of mine for years, and since my followers enjoyed it, I’m posting a few more songs that I listen to this time of year.

First up:

This is just surreal:

This one will only make sense if you’ve read The Shadow over Innsmouth. You can skip it otherwise.

And finally, the Christmas song I love so much I mentioned it in my novella:

Doing this reminded me: the great Andrew Sullivan, back when he ran the Daily Dish, would take breaks from writing about serious topics like politics and war to post “Mental Health Breaks”—usually funny videos or beautiful pictures. I can see now why he did it.

Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays!

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Katie Dawn of Real Woman’s Health painted these wonderful portraits of Mark Paxson, Carrie Rubin, and yours truly.

These are just too good not to share. I’m seriously thinking of using Katie’s rendering of me as my new profile picture. Check out her blog and follow her on Twitter!

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For the last five years, I’ve been in a friendly fantasy football league. Fantasy football works like this: you have a team of a few players–my league’s format is 1 quarterback, 2 running backs, 3 wide receivers, 1  tight end, 1 kicker and 1 defense. Each week, players at those positions accrue points for what they do in the real-life NFL games.  My league is head-to-head, so my goal is for my players to score more combined points than the team I’m matched up against each week.

It’s a lot of fun.  It’s mostly luck, but there is a little skill involved–or at least, I’ll claim there is, because I won my league a few years ago, and it’s more fun to brag if I can say it was because I am a football expert.

So, I started thinking: for what other activities could you make up this sort of game? And I ultimately settled on movies.

Like many people, I like to imagine my “dream all-star cast” for movies. But anyone can do that. Fantasy film-making needs to have an element of strategy and resource management.  So, I came up with some rules.

The format of the Fantasy Movie Cast/Crew is as follows:

  • 1 Director
  • 1 Lead Actor
  • 1 Lead Actress
  • 1 Supporting Actor
  • 1 Supporting Actress
  • 1 Screenwriter
  • 1 Cinematographer
  • 1 Composer

Yes, I realize it takes a lot more people to make a movie, but as with Fantasy sports, there have to be some constraints.

Another constraint: you are only allowed to have two Academy Award-nominees per “team”.  That is what brings out the strategic element–it forces players to prioritize where they want the proven talent.  That’s not to say only Academy Award nominees are any good, but again, as with fantasy sports, you have to know how to find under-valued talent to succeed.

Also, you can’t cheat and use one nominee in multiple slots–no written by/directed by/starring the same person.

Finally, the selection is limited to living people–so no building All-Time teams with Stanley Kubrick directing Peter O’Toole or something.

So, here’s my team:

Director: Mike Leigh. Using one of my two Oscar slots right off the bat.  I figured having an established presence at the helm would be important. He also has experience directing in theater as well as film, and I think that versatility would be useful.

Others I considered: Sir Kenneth Branagh, Rian Johnson.

Lead Actor:  Roger Guenveur Smith. This is what I mean about under-valued talent.  I have seen Smith perform live in his one-man show Juan and John, and he is a marvelous actor. Why isn’t he more widely known?  Beats me.  He is excellent at cycling through a huge range of emotions, and can create all different kinds of characters–often in the space of a few minutes.  He also has a distinctive voice and memorable presence.

Others I considered: Ewan McGregor, Joel Edgerton, Ralph Fiennes

Lead Actress: Natalie Portman. Yeah, yeah; long-time readers probably knew I would pick her the minute they read the description of the game.  Well, she’s a great actress with a wide range, and a particular knack for dark or tragic roles.  Besides which, for a movie to succeed, it helps to have at least one big-name lead.

Others I considered: Rachel Weisz, Sigourney Weaver, Felicia Day

Supporting Actor: Stephen Colbert. People know him mainly as a talk-show host, but he does have a background in acting, which you could see sometimes on The Colbert Report when he would really dial up the crazy.  I read once that he said he always wanted to play Richard in Robert Bolt’s A Man For All Seasons. Just the fact that he said that earns him some acting credit, in my book.

Others I considered: Jeff Lewis, Hugh Laurie

Supporting Actress: Sara Kestelman. Like Smith, I first heard of Kestelman when she was voice acting in the game Knights of the Old Republic II. Since then, I’ve seen her perform in all sorts of things.  But it’s still her KotOR II role that best showcases what a terrific actress she is. While the writing is terrific, I think  Kestelman’s acting also made Kreia into one of the greatest characters in gaming history.

Others I considered: Rashida Jones, Tina Fey

Screenwriter: Anthony Tambakis. His work on Jane Got a Gun and his novel Swimming with Bridgeport Girls impressed me enough to take a chance on someone with a relatively small body of work.

Others I considered: None. There aren’t too many active screenwriters whose work I like.

Cinematographer: Steve Yedlin. I’ve only seen one movie on which he served as cinematographer: The Brothers Bloom. But it had something I really, really liked: color. Not just muted greens and greys and browns, but honest-to-goodness colors. This has fallen out of fashion for some reason, and it’s annoying. So, on the basis of his willingness to accommodate the full spectrum of colors, I choose him.

Others I considered: Dick Pope.

Composer: Lisa Gerrard. Another talent I first discovered in Jane Got a Gun. Since then, I’ve heard her work in the band Dead Can Dance, and I was hooked.

Others I considered: Clint Mansell

As for what the movie would be about–well, we can sort those details out later! That’s how the big studio producers do it, after all. As for scoring and head-to-head competitions, those also can be determined later.

How would you build your ideal movie cast and crew?

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It’s been a long time since I checked the spam comments folder to see what sort of hilarity is in there.  Let’s see what we’ve got…

“I truly love yoour blog.. Veery ice colors & theme.

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Personally, iif all webmasters annd blogyers mae excellent conttent materioal ass yyou probably did, thhe interbet wil probably bee muh more useful than evber before.
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Moneey annd freedom iis tthe bbest waay tto change, may youu bee ridh
and contjnue too hlp others.”

The cheeldren of the night. Vhat music they make!

“People really does a lot more than visitors’ expectations. Many thanks with regard to render these types of valuable, trustworthy, edifying as well as trendy applying for grants this issue to help Kate.”

This mixture of the generic spam and the oddly specific ending is a little unsettling.  I hope whatever Kate needed wasn’t serious.

“all the time i used to read smaller content that also clear their motive, and that is also
happening with this piece of writing which I am reading at this time.”

Keep me informed.

“I’ll immediately grasp your rss as I can’t in finding
your email subscription link or e-newsletter service. Do you’ve any?
Please let me recognize so that I could subscribe. Thanks.”

Never grasp the rss on a first date.

“The most clear career selection as a graduate of a Masters
in Hospitality Management degree would be to take on a management function in the hospitality sector.”

Actually, this may not be spam.  It could be my old college career advisor.  Their advice was about as useful.

“Oh my goodness! Amazing article dude! Thanks, However
I am having troubles with your RSS. I don’t
understand the reason why I cannot subscribe to it.
Is there anybody having identical RSS problems? Anyone that knows the solution will you kindly respond?
Thanx!!”

I dunno… I hear Kate has some problem. Could be related to grasping her RSS.

“It’s remarkable to visit this web page and reading the
views of all mates on the topic of this article, while I am
also eager of getting familiarity.”

Look, I believe in taking it slow.

“Frequently also endowed using a positive, outgoing character. Double Virgo: Aug 23 – June 1 With a powerful need to repeatedly check specifics – this double Virgin basically enjoys the constant search for brilliance. To others they often times seem to be in constant action. An incredibly realistic, but bold form Virgo. Relatively of a social climber, they logically operate their approach up any hierarchy they’ve their views fixed on. Virgo + Taurus: Sept 13 – September 22 Consequently they tend to worry significantly less than one other two decantes. Functional to the primary and not one to be lured into routes of fancy. Dual Libra: June 23 – Oct 2 An energetic social existence of some type is crucial for this decante. A sense of justice is inborn, they have minor patience for those that donot follow the guidelines of the terrain. It is a cooler sort Libra, there is more emphasis placed on creating the intelligence. A liking for bigger events is present. Being a part of a bunch or membership can also be important for them. An extremely chatty Libra decante indeed. People skills are highly developed, acquiring buddies is straightforward for this 1. This sort includes a sturdy requirement for a spoken outlet. Dual Scorpio: Oct 24 – Nov 2 Able to determine other’s celebrities in a heartbeat.”

I’m a Leo, so this is of no use to me. Perhaps it will help Kate.

“You won’t eel any cravings forr an extenred time and you will be capawble to avoid any etra calories.
Don’t try to find it in a single “magic” pill contrived by modern medicine.”

I won’t. Certainly not after what happened to Kate.